Tuesday, 5 May 2009

i am gales

i'm trying my best not to be really emo right now but it's not going so well. apologies in advance. i don't know. i just feel reallyyyyyyyy conflicted about everything. mostly exams and summer and LIFE. i am sosoososososososo scared that i am not going to get the grades i need. i have been working but i don't know if that's enough. my track record with getting grades i need has not been going too well so far. i rely a lot on intuition too and a part of me can clearly see myself passing and getting into uni and have everything fall into place but then again i can see myself failing and hating myself forever.
great. okay. emoness aside. apart from this: i really don't think anyone understands how worried/pressured/scared i am about it! i know right, how original, ~nobody understands me~. w/e. OKAY ENOUGH OF THAT. this house makes me feel like utter shit. there's SUCH bad energy here it is insanely difficult to live in.

in other news i made a pair of shorts today in an effort to stop myself from having a panic attack and it worked! i want new clothes. i want i want i want.
i want a fucking hug! i want to stop being such a moody bastard harhar. seeing josh&caitlin's pictures of europe = me wanting to go france/germany this summer. that better happen.
it would be nice. i miss kate and anisa sosososososoosSO bad. i want to be able to connect with people but i feel like something is holding me back.
i feel like i'm 15 again. not good.


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